life

Here's a list of all that I am (or feel) responsible for right at this moment. Besides dropping school, I need to filter out some of these as well.

1. My kids and their emotional and physical health, including taking them to appointments, working on Tyler's IEP, getting Tyler stabilized, and helping Tayler with her anxiety.
2. My husband and working on our relationship.
3. My body and losing weight, caring for my hair and body, seeing the doctor regularly..
4. My kids and their activities including homework, soccer, choir, girl scouts, and plain old social interaction.
5. My house and taking care of it - that means doing the laundry and the dishes and helping out with keeping things clean and orderly.
6. My writer's group and keeping the prompts going and writing what I can for that. I want to keep this one because I enjoy writing.
7. My job and making up the time I've had to take to cover responsibilities above.
8. My debt and paying it off while not incurring any additional debt.
9. My friends and being a supportive and caring friend who is there when they need me.

I told my psychiatrist my life seems impossible right now. She said that's normal. My life would be impossible for anyone, she said.

She said, even if everyone in my life were healthy and happy, including me, my life would be challenging for most people. I have additional hurdles, and the playing field isn't level for me. And a lot of people in my life are not healthy and happy, the most important ones being my kids.

She said, forget school for right now. Your family needs you.

She said, push everything off the table except what you absolutely have to do. That will leave you space to handle the emergencies, and maybe even space for yourself.

Good advice. Maybe this will help me get out of bed easier in the morning knowing I only have to do x many things. I don't know.